Wednesday 9th March 2016
After having done the formative assessment, in this session we were asked to print off two copies of our essays' introductions and bring them into the seminar. In the seminar we were paired up with someone else that was not doing the same question as yourself. After doing so we would read through the introduction and later come back to it to assess it from a peer point of view - breaking down what the person can improve on and what they have done well, so on an so forth. And finally, just before the papers were handed back to their initial owners, we were asked to read out the opening sentence of the paragraph, and using this opportunity as a group assessment of the persons writing. Then handing them back and having to take the feedback in for use later on, likely to improve upon before the final hand in for the essay.
A few of the things that we had to break them down with were the following; Is there a strong opening line? Is it engaging? Do they use short strong sentences? Is it interesting to read, would you read the whole essay? and is there a strong & informed voice? These were the given questions that we had to use to assess the introductions, using our own initiative alongside this to craft some other usable questions. The paper that I was given to assess was answering the Brand / Antibrand question. The feedback given to the writer included; Strengthening the arguments for the branding side of the essay in the introduction, to work on the referencing in the intro - using proper APA referencing, failing to give an opinion in the opening line and that the opening sentence needed shortening. These were accompanied by a singular positive mention over this piece, saying that it used strong and plentiful sentences as it got further into the introduction - very similar to what is required for an abstract piece of writing.
Moving from assessing another's piece of work, I come back around to the assessment given to my own piece of writing. Starting off with having to shorten my opening sentence of the introduction - something I noticed during the reading to the rest of the class, making it more concise to strengthen the opening. They mentioned that the title needed changing to suit the content of the essay, which is something that can be taken either way (doing so would make it slightly more personal in a sense). There is a lack of variety in the sentence variations, and then goes on to mention the positives - such as, 'opening paragraph explains the topic of essay well', and that the 'opening sentence addresses the content'.
Examining the notes of this session, I believe it to be a successful seminar in that it was eye-opening and can only lead to a strengthened essay. Working back into it prior to final hand in is a must, of course alongside the added 2500 words in content. This lecture comes in two parts, the second coming the week of the 14th March and will instead be looking at the conclusion of the essay, rather than the introduction.
